Vulva Shaming - A Widespread Phenomenon?

Let's be honest for once. We women are often plagued by self-doubt. Especially when it comes to our bodies, we often feel insecure and compare ourselves to an imaginary ideal of beauty. Vulva shaming, in all its forms, also falls into this category.

"Are my labia too big?" "Are my labia too small?" "Is my period disgusting?" "Does my vagina look ugly?" These are all typical questions that reflect shame and insecurity. Reason enough for us to get to the bottom of the vulva shaming phenomenon.

What is behind vulva shaming?

Put simply, vulva shaming is a special form of body shaming in which we feel shame and sometimes even disgust towards certain areas of the body. In this case, it revolves around the vulva. Such a phenomenon is less common in the male mind and is rather difficult to comprehend. Of course, men are somewhat ashamed of a "small penis", but the male genitalia tends to be associated with positive attributes both internally and in public.

The vagina is a completely different story. And this is partly due to the derogatory comments and winged words that have developed over time. What about insulting comments about a vagina that has been stretched after giving birth? Or what about derogatory terms such as "turkey" when the labia minora extend beyond the labia majora?

Wording contributes to vulva shaming
At the same time, the vagina itself has negative connotations in our everyday language. We only have to make a comparison with the male phallus or testicles. Epithets such as latte, cock, balls, crown jewels, lance etc. exude power and tend to have positive connotations. And what about our vagina? You don't even need the nasty "F-word" to realize that the vagina has a rather negative connotation.

Or how else to explain epithets such as cunt, hole, slit, crack, fish store and the like? Seen in this light, the choice of words in everyday language contributes greatly to the problem of vulva shaming. Of course, we don't have to invent artificial terms of endearment with positive connotations. It would be enough if we referred to our vagina as vagina, vagina or vulva. Self-confidence and all that - you get the idea.

What does the camel toe have to do with vulva shaming?

Ok, almost all of us have (intentionally or not) had a camel toe - or at least seen one live and in the flesh. For all those who are unfamiliar with the term, a camel toe is a term used to describe when the labia are clearly visible under tight pants, tights or leggings.

Due to the resemblance of this supposedly fashionable slip to a camel toe, it is called a camel toe. The tabloids are all too happy to pounce on photos of celebrities wearing camel toes. Why the alleged faux pas? Quite simply because the camel toe is much more normal when wearing tight pants than the glittering fashion world would have us believe.

This promotes a completely inverted self-image, as emerging labia are portrayed as absolutely abnormal. Paradoxically, the opposite applies to underwear advertising for men. In fact, it is often the marketers themselves who use digital image editing to make men's genitals stand out even more.

To be honest, it could also be noted at this point that the manipulation also gives men the impression that large genitals are normal. Whether penis or vagina - there is no reason to be ashamed of the appearance of your genitals. And that should soon put an end to vulva shaming, shouldn't it?

Period shaming as part of vulva shaming

Vulva shaming doesn't stop at the appearance of labia and the like. Part of vulva shaming is so-called period shaming - i.e. the shame of one's own period. Menstruation is associated with shame and disgust. This applies not only to menstruation itself, but also to tampons and other aids associated with it.

Crazy, isn't it? After all, it is a completely normal physical process that is almost the same for all women and girls. And yet many women are afraid that other people might notice their menstruation. For some, it is barely even possible to walk from the car to the front door with a pack of tampons. It is high time to put an end to this vulva shaming nonsense.

"Is my vulva normal?"

The question "is my vulva normal" is something that concerns many women and girls who suffer from vulva shaming. It is already common for us women to worry about visual problem areas such as our stomach, legs and bottom and to think about what we can do about them. This mechanism is now also extending to the vagina through vulva shaming. More and more women are orienting themselves towards a striking ideal of beauty and are therefore often particularly critical of their own vagina.

After all, the "ideal image of a presentable" vagina looks like this: clean-shaven, peach-shaped, slightly pink, hidden labia minora and fragrant. This perception of vulva shaming has already had an impact on everyday sexuality for many women. In a survey on vulva shaming, for example, many women stated that they abstained from oral sex out of shame.

Plastic surgery against vulva shaming?

But this is by no means the tip of the vulva-shaming iceberg. In fact, the vulva plastic surgery business is booming. According to the German Society for Aesthetic Surgery, intimate surgery was the seventh most common procedure for women in 2010. Whether it's padding of the mons veneris, reduction of the labia minora, liposuction or reduction of the clitoral skin.

Here too, the possibilities are almost unlimited. And only in the rarest of cases do the procedures have anything to do with discomfort during sexual intercourse or cycling. In most cases, vulva shaming and optical self-optimization are simply behind it. This is actually an untenable situation. It's definitely time for us women to take a more positive view of our vulvas and stop vulva shaming.